Pina Colada – King Neptune’s Treat


Pina Colada – King Neptune’s Treat

Pina Colada and tiki drinks are a rite of passage in tropical climes. Sailing across the equator transforms you from Polywog to Shellback and initiates you into the court of King Neptune. Most celebrate with one of these, but you can also do it at home!

Balancing Sweetness

A good pina colada toes the line just befor falling off the cliff into a cloying, syrupy abyss. That’s where the home cocktail enthusiast can take control and mix a perfect drink. Cream of coconut is the key and a proper dose is critical. Begin with a little and add more until it reaches that goldilocks taste.

Cracking That Coconut

This is surprisingly easy and it’s fun using real coconut for your serving vessel. Check for freshness by shaking and listening for the slosh of water inside. No slosh means, old, dry and spoiled.

Hold them carefully over the sink in the palm of your hand and rap with a hammer. Start about three-fourths of the way up where you want to break the top. Rap and rotate around the perimeter until you hear it crack and continue until it completely separates. Drain the water and rinse it out.

Coconut Water

Many ask if they should drink the coconut water and it’s a fair question. If it seems wasteful to let it flow down the drain, you can save and filter it for drinking. It provides hydration and a healthy dose of potassium, but doesn’t cure common disease. The taste is an acquired one and your mileage may vary.

  • Author: TJ


  • 4 oz light rum
  • 4 oz cream of coconut
  • (2) 8 oz cans of pineapple chunks packed in 100% juice – separated
  • 1 oz fresh lime juice
  • 1/4 cup crushed ice
  • Paper umbrellas – garnish
  • Fresh coconuts – cracked open, drained and rinsed


  1. Separate the pineapple, freeze the chunks and chill the juice
  2. Prep the coconut(s)
  3. When the pineapple chunks are frozen, add them, rum, lime and pineapple juice, ice and cream of coconut to a blender
  4. Pulse until combined like a slushy and the ice and pineapple chunks can be sipped through a straw
  5. Pour into a coconut shell and garnish with an umbrella

pina colada