Monkey Gland

You’ve sipped a Fuzzy Navel and indulged in Sex on the Beach. Maybe you’ve whispered “Bend Over, Shirley” at the bar, or moaned for a Screaming Orgasm. Then there’s the deeply repressed desire for a Monkey Gland.

All of these drinks were crafted not just to be consumed—but to be felt. Their names tease, provoke, and flirt their way onto your tongue, much like the person you hope to be drinking with.

Do I have your attention?

The Origins of the Monkey Gland

The Monkey Gland cocktail emerged in the roaring 1920s—a time when morals were loose, drinks were strong, and Paris was pulsing with creative (and sexual) energy. If you can get past the mental image the name inspires, you’ll be rewarded with a bold, complex cocktail that’s absolutely worth your curiosity.

Its allure is threefold: a scandalously suggestive name, the once-forbidden thrill of absinthe, and a flavor that doesn’t quit.

The drink is credited to Harry MacElhone, owner of the legendary Harry’s New York Bar in Paris. His bar became the epicenter of Monkey Gland mania—thanks in no small part to its proximity to a certain notorious doctor.

Why It’s Called the Monkey Gland

In the 1920s, science was still madly chasing the fountain of youth. Enter Dr. Serge Voronoff—a Russian-born, French-educated surgeon with a flair for the dramatic. He believed that transplanting animal tissue into humans could transfer desirable traits.

His specialty? Grafting monkey testicle tissue onto human nether regions.

Yes, you read that right.

Voronoff claimed this would restore youth, energy, and most importantly—sexual vitality. Thousands of men willingly underwent the procedure, paying the modern equivalent of tens of thousands of dollars for what amounted to a simian testosterone upgrade.

While the science didn’t hold up, the myth of renewed virility certainly did. It was only a matter of time before the story inspired a drink—equal parts seductive, shocking, and satisfying. MacElhone, along with Frank Meier of the Ritz, turned the scandal into a sensation. The Monkey Gland cocktail was born.

And it lives on—still featured on the menu at New York’s famous Monkey Bar, still daring you to order it out loud.

And just one more thing…

One can only imagine what Dr. Voronoff might attempt today with CRISPR in one hand and a scalpel in the other. But until that particular cocktail of science and fantasy becomes reality, may I suggest raising a glass instead?

Cheers—to dangerous drinks and forbidden pleasures. Print